Mondays with Megan: On Movement

Jesus went up to Jerusalem for one of the Jewish festivals. Now there is in Jerusalem near the Sheep Gate a pool, which in Aramaic is called Bethesda and which is surrounded by five covered colonnades. Here a great number of disabled people used to lie—the blind, the lame, the paralyzed. One who was there had been an invalid for thirty-eight years. When Jesus saw him lying there and learned that he had been in this condition for a long time, he asked him, “Do you want to get well?” “Sir,” the invalid replied, “I have no one to help me into the pool when the water is stirred. While I am trying to get in, someone else goes down ahead of me.” Then Jesus said to him, “Get up! Pick up your mat and walk.” At once the man was cured; he picked up his mat and walked.  (John 5)

“Megan…” she responded to my previously over-zealous statement, “you did it. You picked up your mat – you are walking….”  I looked at my therapist with tears streaming down my face. For the first time in a very long time, these were tears of freedom – not pain.
​
It was the darkest, ugliest, most insane season of my life and I had two choices: stay on my mat and wallow, or pick it up and walk. The wallowing felt good for .4 milli seconds before I still wasn’t getting what I wanted and the conditions didn’t change and neither did my perspective. I ran out of wallowing options and decided to give the walking thing a try.

So I pursued it – hard.
I pushed for it – every day.
I worked at it – consistently.

I changed things and had hard conversations and pulled back from some relationships and pushed in toward others. I told the truth, the whole truth, and had realizations beyond my comprehension when I was in the pit.  I could feel myself climbing out dragging my mat and moving my legs again.  Every minute of work I put it toward wellness became something to celebrate.  I called my therapist with more questions and begging for homework. She laughed – and then assigned it. I changed my schedule, my patterns, my thought processes, my – well – almost everything.  Why? Because the former Megan’s way of life led to wallowing. The new Megan’s way of life led to walking. I had to choose to keep walking.
If you have been in the pit, you know this pain. You know these feelings, you understand this desire to wallow and the simultaneous need to walk. It’s the strangest place to be.

But, God. He says: “Do you want to get well?”
And when we try to give an excuse in reply he says, “pick up your mat and walk.”

In this story, He doesn’t say, “here, let me handle all of that for you and you have no part in it.”
He says GET UP.
G E T. U P.
GET UP!
We can not lay on our mats wallowing and expect to get well.

And so friend, today I ask you: Do you want to be well?
Is your pain, anxiety, depression, cycle of mind chaos, over-thinking torment, dysfunction, broken-hearted-decision-making easier to navigate because it’s at least familiar? Are you scared to pick up you mat and walk because “what will happen?” or “what if things change?” or maybe because you can’t control it you don’t want it?

PICK UP. YOUR MAT. AND WALK.

We have a God who loves us and designed us on purpose and for a purpose and we’re going to waste our lives on a MAT because it’s comfortable there and familiar there and it’s what we know and understand?  Give me a break.

God is big and His plans for us are huge but we cannot accomplish anything lying on a mat waiting to get in the pool.

That therapist you’ve been meaning to call? CALL THEM.
That letter you’ve been meaning to write? WRITE IT.
That forgiveness you’ve been meaning to give away? DO IT.
That conversation you’ve been meaning to have? HAVE IT.
That relationship you’ve been meaning to get out of? BREAK IT OFF.
That journal you’ve been wanting to buy? BUY IT.
That small group you’ve been wanting to have? START ONE.
That relationship you’ve been dreaming of? INVEST.
That job you’ve been stuck in? UPDATE YOUR RESUMÉ
That friend you’ve been meaning to tell about Jesus? JUST DO IT.
That habit you’ve been wanting to break? BREAK IT.
That decision you need to make? MAKE IT.
That doctor you’ve been avoiding? SCHEDULE THE APPOINTMENT.
That thought you need to get rid of? RELINQUISH IT.
That behavior you want to change? CHANGE IT.

What on earth are we waiting for? An invitation from Jesus? OH WAIT.

PICK UP YOUR MAT AND WALK.

He loves you and created you and cares for you and wants you off of your mat.
Start the thing, make the call, write the letter, give it up — just don’t wallow.

Sweet friend, you’ll be okay.
It will be hard work, but it will be worth it.
How do I know?
I used to live in the pit, now I live in the sun — off of my mat and onto my legs.

Get moving.